Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I actually pay taxes

Why is there so much evil in the world?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have a reading level above third grade

Est ad incidunt reiciendis ut aut.

I understand how hurricane paths work

I can count

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

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Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Why does Boko Haram attack its own Muslims?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

How does Bollywood influence Indian culture?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Why do so many people suddenly think it's acceptable to continue to live with their parents into adulthood?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

If "thinking" affects feeling, and "feeling" affects thinking, then "why" does this not produce a never-ending circle?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

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EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

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I can read

I don’t buy bullshit

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What measures can companies take to overcome the global talent shortage in IT outsourcing?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Which Korean female celebrities look the best in a bikini?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Will Canadians still buy American products?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I see through liars

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for fakery

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.